For this is the week that People magazine published the absolute very first photographs of the wonderbabies created by Ms. Angelina Jolie and Mr. Brad Pitt.  We can now all gaze with wonder upon the visages of babies Knox Leon Jolie-Pitt and Vivienne Marcheline Jolie-Pitt, or whatever they're called.

But the feature of this story that made it worthy to be included on this blog is the fact that People magazine paid an astounding $14 million dollars (that's an even more astonishing £17 million in British dollars) for the rights to publish these pictures...

 

But the most astounding and astonishing feature of this story is that Branjelina, or AngelPitt, or whatever they're called, donated the entire $14 million to charity.  Can you imagine being so rich that you can give away $14 million dollars?!  Can you imagine being the charity that receives this $14 million donation?  Can you tell me how I can start a charity like this one?  Because you know they're going to be birthin' more babies!

Ironically, the very day that this issue of People magazine released this $14 million dollar issue, these same photos were showing up for free in news stories and on blogs all across the internet.

So the lesson learned is.....if you are a major entertainment publication and you want to spend millions and millions of dollars for an exclusive story, you will need to travel back in time about 20 years to the days before the release of the world wide web in order to get the benefit of that scoop.

This commercial clocks in at an astounding 2 1/2 minutes.  Barely enough time to mention the following list of potential side effects....

May increase the chance of heart attack or stroke, leading to death.

Increases the chance of serious skin reactions or stomach and intestine problems, such as bleeding ulcers, which can occur without warning and may cause death.

Patients taking aspirin, or that have high blood pressure are at a greater risk of these symptoms.

Some patients experienced Indigestion, abdominal pain, and nausea.

Potential stomach bleeding and ulcers.

Not to be taken if you're pregnant, or have an allergic reaction to aspirin.

Possible kidney and liver damage.

And they proudly state that "Celebrex has never been taken off the market".  You can thank the pharmaceutical lobbyists for that.

It would've been fun to do on April Fool's Day, but it's too late for that, now, isn't it?  But who says you can pull pranks only one day of the year, anyway?!  Where's the fun in that?!  We like to really push the envelope here at Wide To Infinity, so we put together a fun experiment you can do in your own office or home or Starbucks or wherever it is you waste time on the internet.

Below you will see a list of links.  They are all links to YouTube videos that feature the theme song from the TV show 'Weeds' -a quirky little series on Showtime that features different musical acts performing their theme song. 

If you click on each link one after another, (each link opens in another window) and then TURN UP YOUR SPEAKERS you will experience a competely annoying experience of several versions of the same theme song, being played by different artists, slightly out of sync with each other (depending on how you click the links).

Weeds Theme - Randy Newman

Weeds Theme - Elvis Costello

Weeds Theme - The Shins

Weeds Theme - Linkin Park

Again, it's just a way to break outside of the April Fool's Day box and be annoying to people any time you damn well feel like it.

Your boss/mother/father/roommate/husband/wife/lover/kids/neighbors

will get a big kick out of it!

And just to make sure we don't get bored with this never-ending race for the White House, it was announced this week that Democratic frontrunner Barak Obama is a distant cousin to Brad Pitt. 

Why didn't anybody catch the resemblance before...

Damn those cousins with their perfect abs!

And not to be outdone, Democratic co-frontrunner Hillary Clinton discovered her roots link her to none other than Angelina Jolie!....

Damn those cousins with their perfect.....everything!

It's a good thing they didn't do this for George W........

 Poor chimp.

I already got 18 hits! He's a popular guy.

The oldest married couple in the world are celebrating their anniversary!  Break out the party hats and the defibrillator!

I particularly like the comments by the news team...

"They look pretty good for after that amount of time!"

"Mmmm-Hmmm"

By the way, this video was captured off the TV, and there's a little glitch towards the end of the video when the couple are walking down a hallway. The video gets stuck for a split second.....but it seems sort of appropriate that you can't really tell, anyway.

There's a new commercial from Honda that is promoting a car that gets 34 miles to the gallon.  It shows the car passing gas station after gas station after gas station (I'm mentioning that because the quality of the video is really crappy).

But the tagline?!!!

That's just not right.

Exactly who OK'd this marketing campaign?

I really don't know if I'd want to own a car that's known as a super gas-passer, would you?! 

So much for that new car smell! 

You have to see that painting, too.  Good Lord!  That bank teller obviously has been channeling Salvador Dali, or something!  Check out those Wild Eyes!  More like 'The Hypnotized Bandit', if you ask me!

The story goes on to say that the painting will be on display at a local Los Angeles art gallery. Right next to the 'Goofy-Looking Arrest Photos' display.

He officially dropped out of the race for President of the United States of America this week.  He might've had some great ideas to run the country, but the media would have had to cover that, and it's not very interesting news. Plus, it's much more interesting when the candidates are slinging their mudpies.

And the networks know that we prefer watching 'The Ultimate Gladiators' rather than give up one of their precious ratings-monitored timeslots to let us learn what the candidates  actually have to say.   The last image we'll have of Dennis Kucinich is the one of him being given a huge kiss from his huge, somewhat miscast wife.

Didn't he realize he never had a chance?  If you're going to be taken seriously, you gotta wear a stovepipe hat, or something! If you don't have looks OR charisma, then at least be loud and obnoxious like Ross Perot.  At least HE got people's attention. 

But what it really comes down to is, did anybody really see this  guy as being a potential leader of our country?  At this semi-fragile point in this country's history.....or is it future?.....we need someone who won't illicit chuckling when he enters the room as the President. 

As Simon Cowell would say, "No offense, but Off You Go!" 

And about that wife....

I mean, I understand that opposites attract, but that doesn't mean it's going to be attractive.  Every time I see them, I think of Casey Kasem and his huge wife. I would never be able to take the Kucinich'ch's seriously as the First Couple!

 "Thanks, Everybody, And Good Night!!!"

But thanks, Dennis.  We hardly knew ye.

Much to my surprise, when I awoke the next morning, I realized I had not been dreaming.  The Kinoki Foot Pads are for real!

Are they kidding me?!!

My feet aren't that filthy every morning! My sheets would be disgusting! And yet, somehow, I'm strangely intriqued. I must buy this product.

I'll let you know how much better I feel after I get these.